So I changed the blog, partly because i was tired of it, partly because i guess that i have changed so much that rereading the old posts made me kind of sad, like i couldn't recognize who had said all those things. i guess i always told people that the whole point of coming here was to change and grow, but i never actually realized it would happen, and definetly not like this. i deleted a bunch of stuff, which is a little scary, kind of like i deleted that part of my life as well, (a bit dramatic, but still..) i didnt see the point of most of the things i had thought were so important to mention.
It was only after i left that i realized exactly how much i hated being there in the first place. People in brazil probably cant stand talking to me on the phone because i am so chippery and annoying, i just want people to shut up and listen to hundreds of my life in france stories. When i go back i am going to be an obnoxious brat going on and on about all the things i did. but i really cant help it, its been very long since i can truely say i am happy, and i am. i am very happy.

...

She sat there, on her favorite seat in her favorite park, in her favorite city. It was already late and she should be getting back home, but it didnt really matter, no one would mind if she was late. she held the bag from the store she had just come from and felt guilty for spending so much money in something so silly, but she loved it, just holding the bag from the store that meant so much to her made it perfect. her phone beeped and her face lit up knowing exactly who it was that was texting, she read the silly text "tfait qwa?". she smiled at how silly he was, she smiled at the fact that she could now understand so easily what was written on it, she smiled at herself just because she felt like it. happy. it had been very long since the last time she could say so, but now, just this moment, sitting there she could tell that she was happy, probably as happy as she would ever be. perhaps she would grow up and never again reach that moment of tottal happiness, but it didnt matter, at this point just the memory of these days would be enough. the phone beeped again "tfait la guele?". she smiled at his sillyness again and stood up. it was time to go.